Have you ever wished you did something that you did for a better reason?  A few years ago I shaved all my hair off and went for a “bald” look.  I did it mainly for two reasons.  First, I was tired of dealing with having to mess with it all the time.  Secondly, I was tired of paying someone to cut it. 

In looking back it was very symbolic of my place on this journey.  In the Old Testament it was common for someone is angst to tear their clothes and shave their heads.  My spiritual journey had hit a place that I did not like and was not satisfied with – I was settled into an angst that seemed to be overtaking me.  I’m not really sure what kicked me into that spot, but there were signs leading that direction for many years prior.  And just as quickly as I moved in, I turned a corner and walked right out of it – I think.  About 6 months ago I began growing my hair back out. 

I wish I had shaved my head as a symbol of where I was – I wish I had grown it out as a symbol of where I was heading.   But I did not and only now see the connection. 

It’s funny, there are people in my life who didn’t know when I had my head shaved and only know the me that has come out of that darkness.  And likewise, there are people that are trying to get used to me with hair. 

A very wise friend of mine pointed me down a path that has been very enlightening to me (thanks Q)…  He reminded me that sometimes we do the best that we can at a given time – even when we look back and through re-evaluation (from a different point on our journey) we see vast differences in what we did then and how we would do it now.  Maybe God had us there to do it that way at that time for a reason.